"And where are you from? Your Jordanian, right?"
"No..."
"Oh then your mom must be American?"
"Well, yes..."
"And you're dad's Jordanian of course."
"Um, not exactly..."
"Then you're AMERICAN???!!!"
"Yes."
A typical conversation with any Jordanian or Arab for that matter- one I've had too many times to count. Usually the person is just blown away: how can someone be American and yet be pretty fluent in Arabic and be born and raised in an Arab culture? I look nothing like an Arab ~ but looks can often be deceiving.
Following the interrogation as to if I'm Jordanian or American, I am then questioned as to where in the States I'm from. New York? Boston? Chicago? Or maybe LA? And when I reply no, I'm actually from Boise Idaho, they either say, "Hmm I've never heard of it", or "So you must like potatoes, right?" I do like potatoes but it's not because I'm from Idaho. I've never actually even lived in Idaho - I was born in Jordan and have been here ever since. However, I am a holder of an American passport. My parents speak of 'Going Home' to the States for the summer. Home? I don't think so.
My heart is with the Arab peoples, be they Christian or Muslim; I empathize with the Palestinians as if they were of my own blood. My mind sees the world from the perspective of an Arab. If I could've had things my way, I would have a Jordanian name and carry a Jordanian passport as well as an American one. I am divided......my looks say one thing but my mind and heart say another.
I have not yet really mentioned my true nationality. Where are my roots? In America? In Jordan? Jordan more so than America, but really neither. Where then is the place I can call home? Where can I be at peace? Where do I belong?
"My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will never be shaken." ~ Psalm 62:1,2~
My identity is in Christ, not in any earthly kingdom. For the things of this world will pass away, but my God is Eternal. In Him do I find true peace and joy. I can rest beause I know that I am in the care of my Father; His love for me never ends. My home is with my King......For I am His Beloved. | 
